As the one year anniversary mark of our big move to Melbourne began approaching a few weeks ago, we found ourselves reflecting upon all of our new experiences. We were no longer novices, we agreed, not quite so likely to be taken by surprise and curiously put out at some seemingly minor difference. I am sure it will be years before we can fully appreciate all we have learned and absorbed, but in the meantime, we have had some fun creating the following, surely incomplete, list.
We have learned to survive without our favorite, American-tasting dairy products and instead have embraced toasted sandwiches, mangoes, golden kiwis, avocados, and especially good coffee. We have not, nor ever will, develop a predilection for Vegemite. This is a food (at least they assure us it falls in that category) that I am sure most human beings would not consider edible unless it had been spoon-fed to them from babyhood.
We love, love, love being able to walk to just about anything that we need in the course of an ordinary week. This includes the best hospital in Melbourne, two dozen bakeries and cafes, numerous restaurants, the library, the butcher, several fruit and veg shops, two grocery stores, church, Target, two tram lines into the city, the train station, schools, half a dozen parks, travel agencies, and shops selling nearly everything imaginable (for a steep price, of course). Is there any place in Pittsburgh that would come close? We think not.
We have learned that it rains a lot more than we expected in Australia. We know from many experiences that if we fail to bring an umbrella, it will almost certainly rain, and that no matter how hot it may be when we leave the house, it is quite possible we will wish we had a jacket with us by the time we return. "Jacket on, jacket off" is a slogan that describes the climate of Melbourne very well.
It may be true that driving in Melbourne will never be as automatic for us as cruising the roads in Pittsburgh, but we have managed to make it bearable by enlisting local expertise in how to avoid what we call the four dreaded "T's": tickets, trams, trains, and tolls. We have also learned to smile and wave when other drivers are irritated with us. Thankfully this has become less frequent of an occurrence.
The following pieces of advice I would give to anyone preparing to move to Melbourne:
**To avoid repeated questioning from nearly everyone you meet, it would be wise to choose two essential things before you land at the Melbourne International Airport: your children's school, and the footy team for whom you will be barracking. Until these matters are settled, you will not be permitted any rest.
**There is absolutely no negotiating over parking tickets. The city council is always right. The owner of the parked car is always wrong and must pay the (steep) price for the error of her ways.
**Unless you want to become $300 poorer, it is imperative to never exceed the speed limit, and to slow down immediately at the first sign of a yellow light.
**If your son plays any kind of sport, there will likely be at least one Lachy (short for Lachlan), or perhaps even two or three, on his team. Your daughters could well becomes friends with a Zara, an Imogen, or a Georgina (or any of the various forms thereof).
**To do almost anything in Australia, from buying a mobile phone to setting up a bank account, to helping prepare hot food at your child's school, you will need 100 points of identification. This means a passport, a visa, and a proper, date-stamped statement from a local bank. What to do if you are trying to open a bank account in the first place? We have learned not to engage in the counterproductive but extremely tempting urge to rant and rave about how ridiculous this is. Instead, a smile and a pleasant response just may elicit a smile in return, and a quiet bending of the originally inflexible rules.
**Australians love paperwork, in spite of their protestations to the contrary. At the very least, they allow their government and institutions to create mountains of it. Be prepared for it, and train your children to fill out their own forms before ever they set foot on antipodean soil.
**Bookings for nearly everything are essential, and far in advance of what the typical midwesterner from the U.S. would consider necessary (which, in all honesty, is almost never at all).
**If you are asked to "bring a plate," do not show up with an empty plate as one of my children nearly did. It is a request to bring food to share with the others invited to the party.
**Before sending your children off to school, make sure they know that "full-stop" refers to the punctuation mark that we call a period. Also enlist help in deciphering the school supply list before you take it to the store with you. "Textas" (pronounced "texters') are colored markers. "Rubbers" are erasers.
**Above all, maintain a sense of humor, consider flexibility your best friend, and practice the extremely helpful discipline of gratitude. A shoulder to cry on from time to time can come in quite handy, and by all means, discover early the things that you love and embrace them, whether that be something as simple and delicious as Tim Tams, or the joy of discovering the gloriously beautiful landscape.
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